The fantasy world no one cares about
“I’m not sure who to start at quarterback this week.”
“Portis is out for the season? Great, there goes my playoff hopes.”
“Nice touchdown! AND he’s on my fantasy team!”
Having a fantasy sports team is like asking a co-worker about his weekend: you really don’t care and you only asked because you want to talk about yours.
Every fantasy team owner I’ve ever known, and this includes me, loves to talk about his team. We love to talk about the keen insight we showed when setting our pre-draft player rankings, how many points we got last week because we were smart enough to start Player X instead of Player Y, and what our chances are to make the “playoffs”.
Whenever I hear someone talk about his team, all I can think is, “How long do I have to stand here and listen to him before I can start talking about MY team and how awesome it is? Is 30 seconds enough?” Realizing how boring it is to listen to someone rattle on about “his players” made me realize something: no one cares about MY team, either.
But how is this possible? Isn’t everyone interested in knowing that I’m 7-4 this season without having Shaun Alexander playing all year? Doesn’t everyone want to know why I started Romo instead of Delhomme last week even though he was inexperienced? How can no one care that I’m well-positioned for the playoffs but would like to pick up another solid running back before the trade deadline?
The truth is, your fantasy team is boring to everyone but you. Talking about it is like showing off your vacation photos, going on about your new MySpace template, or retelling that story about how wasted you were that one Saturday night.
So stop it. Please.
By the way, I went with Terrell Owens over Andre Johnson last week and he got me 17 points. Just saying.
P.S. Read Throwing Hammers' hilarious pre-season post about meeting Peyton Manning and practicing with him.