Even Superman can be a DC tourist
My answer, as you can see in this photo, is yes.
My last-minute Halloween shopping spree at Value Village in Langley Park almost ended fruitlessly, until I found a children’s Superman outfit tucked behind some ragged hand-me-downs. If I had been a cartoon, you might have seen a light bulb comically spring to light above my head as I started to put together my costume idea.
I had to try the costume on first, however, since one should never spend $4 at a thrift store where its return policy is “Fuck Off: You Bought It, You Keep It”. Who’s got that kind of money? But the store didn’t have a dressing room. When I asked an employee where I might find one, she laughed and walked away.
Since there were so many shoppers trying on jackets, shoes, and underwear over their clothes out in the open, I considered doing the same with the Superman outfit. But I was a bit embarrassed putting on a child’s costume without some privacy.
So I walked toward the back, navigating aisles, trying to find some semblance of shelter. Finally, I settled behind the furniture aisle and started to slip on the leggings meant for an 8-year-old. A guy walked by me just then, smiled at me, and said,
“You know you’re not going to fit into that.”
“I know,” I said in the most dignified tone I could muster, “that’s kind of the point.”
I’m not even sure what that meant. In any case, it wasn’t working and I considered scrapping the idea of a Halloween costume all together. But then, a lady walked by and suggested I cut the outfit in half to make it fit. For $4, I decided to throw return-policy caution to the wind and try it out.
I won’t bore you with too many details of the night, but the outfit was a success. The Princess, her friend (my Canadian BFF) Sarah, who was visiting from Japan, and I met up with friends and went out to the Atlas District in search of revelry. We hit the Palace of Wonders and the Argonaut, drank many beers and shared many laughs, and met a bunch of costumed hipsters.
Shiftless Badger dressed up as the Pope and kept blessing everyone; DC Katastrophe (who kindly let me use her photos since BFF Sarah is slacking due to a 14-hour flight back to Japan) dressed up as Audrey Hepburn come back from the grave; her boyfriend went as K-Fed, Foxymoron as a Congressional page with handprints on his ass; and Drew as the shadow guy in the IPod commercials, by far my favorite costume of the night.
More photos to come when I get them.